Can Military Deployment Cost You Custody of Your Kids in California?

So if you're an active duty service member — first of all, thank you for your service. Can your deployment cost you the custody of your kids? The answer may surprise you. In California we actually have a statute, Family Code section 3047, which says no. If an active duty service member is on deployment, we have to return to the status quo: the custody that they had before they were deployed. That's unless — this is California, so there's always a caveat — that's unless, of course, that wouldn't be in the best interest of the child. What in the hell does that mean? Good question. So maybe you go on deployment, maybe you're on a WESTPAC and you're gone for a long time, and maybe you see some combat. And you come back, and then your — what, probably wife, ex-wife — says, "Well, he's changed, he's got PTSD." So even though the statute says that we should return to the status quo ante, guess what: it's not in their best interest. Because now, I think that's a bunch of bullshit. The long and short of it is that in theory you go back to where you were at the time you were deployed, which I think is the right move. I believe that there has to be something significant — much more than histrionics and allegations that you saw combat, or you may have some PTSD — to prevent that. What happens when you do that? Your kids haven't seen you for a while. They're pretty resilient. They're probably going to be happy you're back, and they're going to be proud that you're serving your country.