3 Family Law Mediation Mistakes That Could Cost You Thousands

What are the top three mistakes that people make at a family law mediation? Number one is they pick the wrong mediator. What's the role of the mediator? They're playing both sides against the middle, to try to get a compromise for a settlement. You have to be good at that. You have to understand family law if you're going to resolve a case. Probably a retired judge — but maybe not. It depends on the retired judge, and what did they do? Were they on the family law bench? Did they spend most of their time elsewhere? So knowing and picking the right mediator is of paramount importance. Number two, they go to mediation far too early. It's a really good idea to try to settle your case and not let a stranger in a black robe do that for you at trial. But if you go to mediation and you don't have the facts, you don't have all the discovery you need — what in the hell are you negotiating? You're negotiating in the blind. What's a good deal? Who knows, because you don't know what a normal deal would be, or a bad deal would be, because you don't have the facts. And number three, they go into mediation with the wrong idea. They think that they can essentially get what they want, lack compromise, fail to give concessions, and somehow they're going to bully or intimidate the other side into a settlement. Maybe that works elsewhere, in other forms of business, if you're negotiating with inferior foes. But typically in a family law context, if the attorneys know what they're doing, you're not going to solve anything like that. So going for a couple hours and wasting several thousand dollars is just that — it's a waste. You want to settle your case? Set it for trial. The closer and closer you get, the more and more people will be willing to reach a settlement.